everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize