I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
