THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Boobs speak an international language.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
