I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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