Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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