And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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