Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
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Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
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he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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