So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
where does the pee come out of this thing
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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