we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize