If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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