Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (709): took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable. http://tfl.nu/b0tu
  Replies (18) Good night (913) Bad night (3192)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing http://tfl.nu/j7xf
  Replies (26) Good night (5755) Bad night (1607)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  it's been a while because I don't count the hooker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): it's been a while because I don't count the hooker http://tfl.nu/ahgm
  Replies (10) Good night (814) Bad night (3145)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high. http://tfl.nu/oo1s
  Replies (16) Good night (3163) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm. http://tfl.nu/jyta
  Replies (19) Good night (813) Bad night (4651)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight. http://tfl.nu/nwmv
  Replies (6) Good night (1107) Bad night (1534)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names. http://tfl.nu/wmoo
  Replies (11) Good night (1902) Bad night (711)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on (484): Who said I was judging? More like congratulating. http://tfl.nu/coiy
  Replies (10) Good night (2266) Bad night (661)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  No, I did. It's a long story.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that? (732): No, I did. It's a long story. http://tfl.nu/j226
  Replies (2) Good night (1592) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions http://tfl.nu/mr16
  Replies (24) Good night (2797) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift http://tfl.nu/8l3h
  Replies (8) Good night (1222) Bad night (771)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood. http://tfl.nu/7ohn
  Replies (7) Good night (542) Bad night (1528)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in. http://tfl.nu/k5k2
  Replies (11) Good night (2381) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.

  (214): View more from Texas

  SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME. (214): SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME. http://tfl.nu/sfja
  Replies (12) Good night (1170) Bad night (436)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Drunk yet?

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): Drunk yet? (980): Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me. http://tfl.nu/2v48
  Replies (0) Good night (805) Bad night (293)

Randomize