I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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