dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
