I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize