"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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