Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
