Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
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searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
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You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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