Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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