I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
No subtext here. People are naked.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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