Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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