Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
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He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
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LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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