garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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