Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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