it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
The convent might be a nice break from real life
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
