that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
