Texts From Last Night

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  (360): View more from Washington

  she smelled like a LAN party

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  (360): she smelled like a LAN party http://tfl.nu/lit3
  Replies (35) Good night (897) Bad night (4316)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  birth control should be required to get into college

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  (413): birth control should be required to get into college http://tfl.nu/91c5
  Replies (28) Good night (5683) Bad night (1027)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom

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  (940): good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom http://tfl.nu/suhd
  Replies (31) Good night (1652) Bad night (4245)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman

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  (703): he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman http://tfl.nu/zmqz
  Replies (22) Good night (4258) Bad night (2275)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often

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  (413): your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often http://tfl.nu/h345
  Replies (5) Good night (3187) Bad night (878)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.

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  (443): Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire. http://tfl.nu/qksw
  Replies (16) Good night (3911) Bad night (1593)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work

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  (619): yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work http://tfl.nu/e66y
  Replies (11) Good night (3899) Bad night (901)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.

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  (727): This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade. http://tfl.nu/uwxc
  Replies (3) Good night (1380) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.

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  (708): There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit. http://tfl.nu/svzs
  Replies (6) Good night (2440) Bad night (600)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing

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  (856): I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing http://tfl.nu/iy02
  Replies (10) Good night (1173) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough

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  (931): pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough http://tfl.nu/s0pj
  Replies (4) Good night (466) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy

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  (775): Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy http://tfl.nu/2l3y
  Replies (5) Good night (1257) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven

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  (+44): The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven http://tfl.nu/nqqz
  Replies (11) Good night (865) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.

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  (954): Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs. http://tfl.nu/o9g6
  Replies (3) Good night (464) Bad night (219)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.

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  (541): He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes. http://tfl.nu/w3c8
  Replies (1) Good night (230) Bad night (737)

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