Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Please don't give away my fajitas
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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