go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
