What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
