chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
