new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
