I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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