how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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