he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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