This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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