I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
