im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Randomize
