Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
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