If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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