She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
The power of my boobs compel you
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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