garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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