Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
