I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
