I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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