Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize