Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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