garbage
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you win
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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