i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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