See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
