thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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